Tom's mum puts money on the table in the morning, "When you take tom to school can you buy him 2 new pairs of socks? He doesn't have any now"
"Yep that's fine."
Later Tom comes down, "Did my mum give you money for socks?"
"Yep."
"Okay, I'll just put on some other socks for now." Tom goes and gets ready for school.
Later I call, "Okay Tom let's go."
"Ohh it's embarrassing wearing the wrong socks!"
"Why?"
"It just is."
"Well we'll buy new ones as soon as we get to school. Now come on."
Tom comes to the garage and sees me putting Charly in the pram, "Aren't we driving?"
"No, we're walking. Your mum took the car today so I can't drive."
"Ohhh!" Tom stamps his feet and starts to cry, "But everyone's going to look and see my socks and that's embarrassing!"
"No one's going to look, Tom."
"Yes they are!"
"No...people don't usually look at other people's socks. Now let's go."
"Ohh why can't you drive?"
"Because I don't have the car."
"Why can't you just buy one?!"
I smiled, "I can't buy one now!"
"Well why can't you buy one on the weekend?"
"Because I don't have money to. They're expensive."
"Oh but I don't want to walk!"
"Well we have no other choice," I walk out the door, "Now let's go, we're running late."
Tom slowly and reluctantly walks out the door.
We start down the road.
Tom groans, "Ohh but it's so embarrrasssing! And everyone's gonna look and they're gonna laugh."
"No one's going to notice, Tom, and they wouldn't laugh at you for having the wrong socks."
"Yes they would."
"I don't think so."
"Ohhh," Tom continues to groan, "And there's some annoying people that I don't want to see if we walk!"
"What makes them annoying?"
"They are just annoying and they push us around."
"Well if we see them I'll make sure they don't do that."
"No you won't."
"Yes I will."
"They are so so so so so so so so so so so so so (continued on for 20 more times)..."
"mean?" I asked
"....so so so so so so so so so so annoying."
Silence.
"Everyone's gonna look at me and that's so embarrassing! People will look when they drive past in their cars."
I sighed, "Tom, people can't see your socks from their car windows!"
"Yes they can."
"No they can't, they can't see that well. Anyway you're walking on the other side of the pram so they can't see."
"What if I walk out in front, then they can see," Tom walks faster and looks at the car and starts pointing, "They looked. They looked. They looked. People can see my socks."
"Tom, when you are driving and people are walking on the footpath, it is normal for them to look. But they are looking at the person, not their socks!"
"No they're looking at my socks," Tom was becoming extremely sure of himself.
"No, they're not."
"Yes they are."
"Tom, you're getting worried because you THINK they are looking at you. You think everyone is looking at your socks, but I can promise you they are not."
"Yes they are."
"Tom, people don't even know what socks your meant to wear anyway! It doesn't matter to them. Most people driving in these cars would not go to your school so they wouldn't know."
"That person does," Tom pointed to a car, "And he looked."
Another silence as I walk out in front thinking what on earth kid....
"Tom, if I was you, I wouldn't worry about it."
"Well if I was me, which I am, I WOULD worry about it."
A girl in a highschool uniform comes down the path toward us. Tom looks up, "She's gonna look and that's embarrassing!"
"Tom, she is in highschool! She doesn't know what socks your meant to wear."
Silence as we walk past the girl who stares at the ground and does not glance our way in the slightest.
"See," i said after a while, "She didn't look."
"Yes she did."
"No she didn't."
"Yes she did."
I realize there is no point in arguing. I cannot change his mind.
I point to an interesting tree, "Hey, look at those tree roots!"
"Oh that's soo interesting," Tom says sarcastically.
"Tom," I said firmly, "That's rude, do not talk like that."
"Jack talks like that to me."
"I know and I don't want him to. It's rude."
Tom looks up as we get closer to school and groans, "Ohh there are more and more people! This is soo embarrassing!"
"Well," I said, "I don't think you're embarrassing. I think you're pretty cool."
"You're just saying that."
"No, I mean it."
"No you're just saying that because you don't want me to be sad."
"No I don't want you to be sad but I mean it, how would you know anyway? You're not me and you can't read my mind."
"Yes I can,"
"Tom, no one can read anyone else's minds. I can't read your mind and you can't read mine."
"You can't read my mind," said Tom, "But I can read yours."
I shook my head and walked ahead, "This is getting rediculous."
Tom picks something off a plant and says, "I'm gonna throw this at you."
I turned around and said firmly, "Why would you want to do that?"
"because."
"Because why?"
"Because."
"I want to know why."
Silence.
"Are you mad at me?" I ask (what a guess!)
"Yes."
"Why?"
"Because you didn't drive. And..."
"And what?"
"I'm mad at my parents because they took the car."
"Okay," I said slowly, wondering how on earth I would get anything across to him, "You realize Tom that it was your parents who took the car. Not me. So this is not my fault that we couldn't drive. I had no choice but to walk you to school. So it doesn't make any sense for you to get mad at me about this."
Silence.
"If you forgot the money for my socks then I will be very very very mad and I will cry and cry and cry. And I am NOT going through the school before I put them on."
"Well I didn't forget the money because it's right here in the pram."
We walk into school and find out where to buy socks. The teacher directs me. It involves walking through the school.
"Do I have to come?"
"Not if you don't want to. You can sit here and wait for me to come back."
Tom ends up standing miserably at the school gate while I go buy socks. Finally I come back and he takes them and walks to the bathroom to change.
Saturday, May 28, 2011
Rian, the illegal immigrant
Anni plans on hiding Rian in her home as an illegal immigrant after september so that they can go to Fiji together during Anni’s october holidays. Rian can get stuffed into one of the bags. (anni and rian laugh hard at the thought of a custom inspector opening up a bag with a curled up Rian in it).
Tuesday, May 3, 2011
Look at those beautiful trolly wheels
Rian: “Hey look at those birds! They’re just standing there in the rain! Oh wait, they’re not birds….” Anni, Rian and her mum walk closer, “Oh, they’re the wheels of that trolly.”
Russel Coight Street
25/2/11
I am going to look at open houses tomorrow, one is in russel street in baulkham hills and the other one is Thompson Cresent in Glenwood. I got the two streets mixed up, so tonight I asked Stef, “Do you know where Russel street is in glenwood?”
“No, I’m not sure,” she looked it up and couldn’t find it. “Are you sure it’s russel street?”
“Strange…yeah I’m pretty sure…oh actually maybe it’s Russel Coight Street,” I said without even thinking.
Then I burst out laughing at my stupidity. Russel coight is an Australian comedian! I automatically put the two words together.
Penguins at Manly Beach
11 year old at school writes about his trip to Manly beach and how he went fishing. He writes “Then we decided to go home because it was getting dark and the penguins were coming.”
This jug costs $376,298
“Hello dear, could you please tell me how much this little jug costs, I don’t have my glasses on and can’t read the lable.”
“Yep sure,” I lean forward to read it, “$376,298.”
Shocked silence by everyone else except me.
“Uh….Anni, the price, not the item number!”
“Oh, oh” I quickly try to redeem myself, “Um, $20.”
“Yes but isn’t it reduced?”
”Oh,” Anni notices that the original price has been crossed out “Yep. It’s $16.”
“Yep sure,” I lean forward to read it, “$376,298.”
Shocked silence by everyone else except me.
“Uh….Anni, the price, not the item number!”
“Oh, oh” I quickly try to redeem myself, “Um, $20.”
“Yes but isn’t it reduced?”
”Oh,” Anni notices that the original price has been crossed out “Yep. It’s $16.”
Christmas reflections of a 7 year old
10/12/10
It’s nearly Christmas. I was nannying and they had their christmas tree up, so conversation naturally got onto christmas.
8-year-old Tom said, “You know what I really want to do…I want to install a camera into one of these balls on the tree so that I can find out whether Santa’s really real or not.”
I smiled, “That would be a good idea.”
“My friend at school did it, like he installed the camera and everything and it worked and he said he saw santa!”
“Oh really?”
“Yeah.”
“We have our presents on Christmas eve because it’s the German tradition”, I said.
Tom looked confused, “Oh, does Santa go to Germany first?”
“Maybe. But everyone in Germany has their presents on Christmas eve.”
Tom looked shocked and exclaimed, “Really, so Santa doesn’t go to Germany at all?!”
I tried SO hard not to laugh. “I don’t know…maybe he doesn’t.”
“Oh,” Tom thought for a while and said, “What if you don’t have a chimney? How does Santa get in?” Then after another second’s thought, “Oh he probably just goes down those pipe things on the side of the wall.”
Another stifled laugh by me, loving every minute of this conversation.
“But we don’t have any pipe things either…he probably has to smash a window to get in,” Tom said.
“Or maybe he’s invincible!” I said, “Maybe he can come through the window without needing to smash it.”
Tom stared off in the distance and then a lightbulb suddenly switched on in his head, “Oh I know! Maybe Santa is Jesus!”
I raised my eyebrows, wondering where he would go with this,
“Because Jesus would get lots of presents on his birthday and he would be like ‘I don’t need all these’ so he would want to share them with the rest of the world. It makes sense because Jesus wouldn’t need to smash a window to get into the house.”
By this time it was too much to contain my laughter but I managed to control it enough to get a small smile out of Tom, probably wondering what I found so funny.
“Who gives Jesus presents?” I said.
“Oh lot’s of people,” Tom said confidently and began counting his fingers, ‘There’s the three wise men, joseph, mary, God, the angels…”
I smiled, “Well there you go, that’s an interesting thought!”
A few days later he was talking about the Christmas decorations and he told me a cockroach had bitten into one of the rock hard santa decorations and made a hole in it. I tried not to laugh as I pictured the tiny, fragile soft mouth with no teeth of a cockroach managing to claw into a solid rock santa!
As we looked at his christmas tree he said in a matter-of-fact voice, “This Christmas tree is 7.5 metres tall.”
I love how kids just speak their minds and are so confident in what they are saying! (the measurement was a little off…something like 2 metres would be a bit of a better guess!)
Old water
Anni was about 7 years old when she was forced, along with the rest of her family, to clean up downstairs. Such a drag. She then looked into a box and found an old drinkbottle that she hadn’t seen for possibly a year. It still has water in it. Sweet, Anni thinks, I’m thirsty so this works out perfectly. And she proceeds to drink it. And manages to get a fly stuck in her throat.
Hair drying disaster
Anni casually sticks a hair drier top blast full heat into her wet shoe to dry it up and manages to not only burn a hole in her shoe but also shrivel up the sole.
Anni's car adventures
El offers Anni her car while El is away in Tasmania. Day 1 – Anni takes car out for a test run and does all right until it’s time to turn around. Realizes she has no idea how to put it into reverse. Tries harder. Gets more worried. Is sitting in a stranger’s driveway. The car is revving like crazy. Luckily the driveway is steep and because anni is smart she drives up the driveway and then lets it roll backwards while she turns around and drives back home.
Day 2: Anni goes to fill up the car with petrol at Hornsby Heights petrol station. A little worried that something will go wrong and she will embarrass herself. She drives in to the petrol station and fortunately goes to the right side but unfortunately drives way too close to the tank and can hardly open her door to get out. Then she picks up ‘leaded’ instead of ‘unleaded’ and forgets if you have to press the handle as soon as you take it out of the tank or if you just leave it. Decides to press the handle. Petrol pump shakes and petrol comes spilling out everywhere all over anni and the car and the ground.
Oops.
Quick, put it back in! Try again…okay, good, no more petrol coming out. Now, put it in the car……anni sticks it too far into the car and presses but nothing comes out. She pushes it even further in and presses but again nothing comes out. Finally looks up and sees petrol station man looking at her and furiously shaking his head while holding up his hand to signal ‘stop! Stop!’
Uh oh…
Petrol station man comes out. “Is it not coming out?”
“Yeah it’s not working.”
“You’re pushing it in too far,” he said and took the pump from me, “Look, you only put it in this far.”
“ohh…”
“Oh this is leaded, is that what you wanted?”
I looked, “Oh oops no I meant to get unleaded!”
Petrol station man throws his hands into the air despairingly and says, “Oh now you’ve done it again! You can’t use the same tank for unleaded if you’ve already used leaded! You’ll have to reverse the car back to this other tank.”
Anni gets back into car thinking this is beyond embarrassing. Reverses to the other tank, gets out, and petrol station man fills up her car for her.
Laughing through a uni presentation
Anni and Lauren in Nutrition tutorial where everyone is doing their group presentations and are being assessed. Everyone gets a paper where they peer mark each other’s presentation. There are different boxes of criteria and what it’s out of. For example “gave background knowledge of culture” and that would be out of 5, 5 being the best and 1 being the worst. There are 6 rows (obviously meaning 6 different presentations). Before anyone even starts Anni generously decides to give everyone full marks for their presentation and writes that down on all 6 rows. Lauren looks, cracks up and says “There’s only 4 presentations today and one of them’s us.” Oh damn, that will be a give-away to my assessor who collects all the peer marks in the end. Anni cracks up. Then the whole tutorial, every time anni and Lauren even look at each other they crack up and try soo hard to hold it in while other people are doing their group presentations. Sometimes they were successful, other times they just lost it in inappropriate moments. One time anni laughs so hard that tears roll down her face. The whole 2 hours become torture trying to hold in the laughs. Finally anni’s group gets up to do their presentation. Anni is the first one to speak. She starts, gets through about 5 sentences and then bursts out laughing in front of the whole tutorial and the assessor. Everyone is silent. “Sorry guys, we had a personal joke before and I can’t stop laughing.” Lauren starts cracking up behind her. Anni keeps trying to get through the slides but keeps laughing, eventually gives up and lets someone else do their part. Anni and Lauren crack up throughout the presentation and finally the class ends and they breathe again.
Gloria Jeans
Anni comes up to counter at Gloria Jeans and orders banana bread. Then sits at a table, puts her stuff there and waits. Name is called. She goes up, leaving her bag at the table, gets the banana bread then completely in her own world goes to a completely different table and starts eating the banana bread, not realizing this was someone else’s table and they were up collecting their order. Realizes after about a minute, says “Oh” and moves and then hears the Gloria Jeans girls giggling behind her. Then she can’t stop laughing but is by herself so tries to hold it in.
Hammering a stupid screw
Anni spends 15 minutes trying to hammer this stupid screw into a piece of wood for her stupid science assignment at uni. After much ferocious hammering she gave up in frustration. And then realized two days later she should have used a screw driver.
Rolling rock
9/10/05
Tonight I was walking down the path and I had the cd player in my hand. What I didn’t realize was that the cord was dragging along the ground. I thought that a rock was rolling down the path. So I was quite amused that this rock was following me the whole way down. I laughed and turned around to watch it and then realized it was the end of the cord from the cd player I was holding!
b-r-e-a-k
29/5/05
It was so funny today at work, someone rang while Jane was on a break. It was her mum.
“Hello, is Jane there?”
“No, she’s on a break.”
“Sorry?”
“She’s on a break.”
“A break?”
“Yeah.”
“What’s a break?”
“Uh…a break. A lunch break.”
“B-R-A…?” She started spelling out the word.
“No, B-R-E-A-K” I giggled.
“Oh, oh break!”
Wow, her brother looks like her
13/2/05
Tonight at church I was talking to Michelle Garret. We were talking about Caz’s wedding yesterday and I was going to tell her that I saw a guy there that I met at Michelle’s party. So I said, “Hey, at your party, you know that girl…shortish, dark hair?”
“Um…” she thought…
I tried to help her think, “She has a brother that looks like her…” I was trying to describe her as best as I could.
“Oh wow!” Michelle said (thinking that was the end of the conversation) haha! Everyone burst out laughing.
Food fight
6/1/05
Tonight me and Jess were sitting at the table. She pulled out one of her snack bars and said, “You HAVE to try this!”
“Yuck!” I said, “No, I don’t like the flavors inside it.”
“You have to try it! Just the end piece!”
“No!”
“You’re so stubborn!
“I don’t care.”
Jess grabbed a piece and tried to stick it in my mouth. I turned away, so she threw it at me. I picked it up and threw it back at her. From there became a food fight! We screamed with laughter and threw bits of snack bar at each other. When I threw this one piece it landed inside her belt in a very inappropriate spot. We laughed so hard we couldn’t breathe.
Jess threw a piece at me but I ducked and it hit the wall behind me.
Our best geeker
27/10/03
On Sunday morning, Bill was the guest speaker and did the sermon. Ian was meant to say, “I’m going to invite our guest speaker from Adelaide to come up now.” But he accidentally said, “I’m going to invite our best geeker from Adelaide to come up now.”
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)
